its finally over!

I never expected na iicpin mong gumaganti aq.. all of a sudden akala q ok lng sayo na wla na tayo.. aun pala iniicp mong ginantihan lang kita!

yeah i know kasalanan ko kung bakit mo iniicp na gumaganti ako.. tama ka! mali ako na wlang explanation kung bkt ayoko ko na.. hindi ko kc alam kung pa'no at kung kaya ko..

ayoko na kc.. maraming gumugulo sa icp ko.. I'm not sure if you really love me or you just need me.. i cnt give you my 100% love because of the trust i cnt fully gave to you! hindi nawawala sa icp ko na magkakabalikan pa kayo.. gusto kitng makasama pero sa tuwing gusto ko savhin sayo yon nararamdaman ko bc ka.. I want to believed that you are mine now.. pero there are times na pakiramdam ko ako ang third party.. hindi ako ang priority mo! wala kang oras sakin pagkailangan kita.. ayoko ng ganon!

Last december i was exited kc alam q malapit ka lng.. there will be a chance na magkasama tayo.. pro nagkamali ako! other than that i've heard a lot of things.. like nagkabalikan na kayo, lagi kayo magkausap.. nandun ka sa knila.. sa kanya galing ang cellphone mo.. xa parin ang mahal mo.. nagbago karin, hindi kna open sakin.. honesty, feeling ko.. xa parin nmn talaga ang mahal mo.. ako? kailangan mo lang ako..

I dont know why i cant tell it to you straightly.. kahit gustong gusto ko ng matapos na ang lahat.. matapos? un nga ba ang gusto q?? honestly, hindi.. ayoko, pero nahihirapan ako.. oo inicp ko n sana hindi kana bumalik at hindi na kita binigyan ang another chance.. pro iniicp ko rin na sana kaya kong hindi mkinig sa mga naririning q.. sana kaya kong hindi icpin ang mga possible things like iiwan mo lng ulet ako kung kelan hindi ko na kaya..

i hope hindi ako nagkamali sa desisyon ko.. pro gusto ko sana.. kht hindi na tayo, maging magkaibgan parin tayo.. close friend! pra kaht papano hindi tayo totally naghiwalay.. nanjan prin tayo pra sa isat isa kht hindi na tayo committed..

i also want to thank you for making my days colorful.. and for the love and care that you shared with me!

i love you goodbye

I'm sorry.. don't try to think that i ended up my relationship with you because i don't love you or i never loved you! that's not true..

i cared for you.. i want you! i need you.. ikaw ang gusto ko! gusto kitang mahalin ng buong buo.. i never loved anyone before the way i loved you! tanggap ko lahat.. handa ako.. hindi ko pinagsisisihan na tinanggap kita uli sa buhay ko kahit na minsan mo na kong sinaktan/nasaktan.. mahal kita.. hindi ko alam kung pa'no ipakita o ipadama.. nahihirapan ako! I'm not so sure if this feelings i have for you is for real! I'm not even sure with your feelings for me!.. there is no assurance that there will be "US" between me and you!

I'm not happy with my decision of leaving you.. honestly, malungkot! namimis kita.. i want to call you and tell you how much i misses your voice pero ayoko!.. ayoko marinig ang boses mo! ayoko marinig ang sasabihin mo dahil ayoko mabago ang desisyon ko! I'm not sure if this decision i made is right, ang alam ko lang.. hindi ko na kaya.. akin ka pero parang ang layo mo.. gusto kitang makasama pero wala ka..ang dami kong gustong gawin kasama ka pero hindi pwede.. I know for some reason that ako ang may problema.. wala akong time, lahat ng gusto mo hindi ko napagbibigayan.. ako rin ang may gusto ng itago natin ang lahat.. mahirap pala.. akala ko kaya ko.. nagkamali ako.. now i know, this relationship i have with you is not for me!

Its really hard to give your 100% love to the person you don't fully trust.. i know you'll understands me..

But, i promise you one thing.. if ever our paths will cross again, and we'll given a chance to back to each others arms.. i will love you to the fullest,i will never ever leave you again.. i will trust and fight for you! promise..

for the mean time.. go find yourself.. i know you can stand now on your own! you don't need me anymore just to forget her! try to build a new you! take care of yourself.. i love you.. goodbye!

am i tolerating them??? nde nman diba? nde.. nde.. nde..

Recently, I feel like I’m carrying something at my back! Ang bigat… I feel like I’m tolerating what they were doing which is MALI! Ayoko but for some reason wala akong magawa… marami akong natutunan sa knya.. Gusto ko umiwas pro mahirap.. marami rin siang naitulong skin! They’re one of those people whom I admire when it comes to work/knowledge! I don’t want to lose them… but every time na magkakasama kami and nakikita ko yung nangyayari between them nde ko maiwasang maapektuhan! (naaawa ako dun sa isa) Nde ko cla tinotolerate pro parang ganon din! parang tinotolerate ko rin cla kapg magkakasama kmi.. aun! Basta.. sometimes nakokonsenxa ko.. parang gumagawa rin ako ng mali sa pananahimik ko sa nakikita ko..

Nde ko alam.. ang hirap!

Am i doing something wrong?

a few days ago i decided to end up my relationship with my boyfriend.. maraming tumatakbo sa isip ko e.. why he suddenly change?! may nagawa ba'ko or hindi ginawa? he lied to me, he doesn't have time, no calls or text.. so i decided ayoko na! but then when visit me and confronted him walang nangyare.. hindi nmn kmi naghiwalay khit na alam na alam kong niloko nya ko for some reason.. Ganon ba katindi yung tama ko sa knya na khit na alam kong he's not worthy ayoko paring mwala xa?

Now, january 01, 2010.. new year.. were still together.. yeah, wer not wid each other but there's still a communication between us! but were not like we were before.. then there's someone.. My drugs.. he really makes me smile.. for some reason i really feel like his my soul mate.. pero parang hindi nmn kmi pang boyfriend/girlfriend material..

Am i doing something wrong? hindi nmn cguro..

i love you

i love you.. i know i really do! i want to show it to you.. i want you to know how much i care for you, i love you.. and miss you! but its hard! you know why? 'cause loving you is one way of losing myself.. i know we have a relationship but being committed to you doesn't mean your mine! i maybe the right one for you.. but I'm not the one you love! You just need me.. i feel it..